The continuing chronicle of Wesley's quest to be published; plus comments on popular culture, family life, and whatever else falls out of his head.

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Ken Griffey's Grotesquely Swollen Jaw

I have a problem.

When I drive to work in the morning, the last song I hear on the radio is inevitably stuck in my head for the rest of the day.

I also have XM Satellite Radio.

Partly due to the above problem, I often listen to the comedy channel or ESPN Radio during the drive into work.

Today I was listening to the comedy channel.

Just before I pulled into the parking lot, they played Talkin' Softball from The Simpsons.

Now I want to claw my eyes out (considering that won't help me hearing songs, I don't know why I'm compelled to do this, but I am).

Well Mr. Burns had done it,
The power plant had won it,
With Roger Clemens clucking all the while,
Mike Scioscia's tragic illness made us smile,
While Wade Boggs lay unconscious on the barroom tile...

We're talkin' softball...
From Maine to San Diego.
Talkin' softball...
Mattingly and Canseco.
Ken Griffey's grotesquely swollen jaw.
Steve Sax and his run-in with the law.
We're talkin' Homer...
Ozzie and the Straw.

We're talkin' softball...
From Maine to San Diego.
Talkin' softball...
Mattingly and Canseco.
Ken Griffey's grotesquely swollen jaw.
Steve Sax and his run-in with the law.
We're talkin' Homer...
Ozzie and the Straw.

(Repeat Second verse until driven into a violent rage or

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Milk and Honey

Moses Sends Scouts into Canaan:

Numbers 13:1-2
GOD spoke to Moses: "Send men to scout out the country of Canaan that I am giving to the People of Israel. Send one man from each ancestral tribe, each one a tried-and-true leader in the tribe."

Numbers 13:17-25
When Moses sent them off to scout out Canaan, he said, "Go up through the Negev and then into the hill country. Look the land over, see what it is like. Assess the people: Are they strong or weak? Are there few or many? Observe the land: Is it pleasant or harsh? Describe the towns where they live: Are they open camps or fortified with walls? And the soil: Is it fertile or barren? Are there forests? And try to bring back a sample of the produce that grows there--this is the season for the first ripe grapes."

Numbers 13:25-28
After forty days of scouting out the land, they returned home. They
presented themselves before Moses and Aaron and the whole congregation of the People of Israel in the Wilderness of Paran at Kadesh. They reported to the whole congregation and showed them the fruit of the land. Then they told the story of their trip: "We went to the land to which you sent us and, oh! It does flow with milk and honey! Just look at this fruit! The only thing is that the people who live there are fierce, their cities are huge and well fortified. Worse yet, we saw descendants of the giant Anak.

Numbers 14:1-3
The whole community was in an uproar, wailing all night long. All the
People of Israel grumbled against Moses and Aaron. The entire community was in on it: "Why didn't we die in Egypt? Or in this wilderness? Why has GOD brought us to this country to kill us? Our wives and children are about to become plunder. Why don't we just head back to Egypt? And right now!"

Numbers 14:11-19
GOD said to Moses, "How long will these people treat me like dirt? How long refuse to trust me? And with all these signs I've done among them! I've had enough--I'm going to hit them with a plague and kill them. But I'll make you into a nation bigger and stronger than they ever were." But Moses said to GOD, "The Egyptians are going to hear about this! You delivered this people from Egypt with a great show of strength, and now this? The Egyptians will tell everyone. They've already heard that you are GOD, that you are on the side of this people, that you are present among them, that they see you with their own eyes in your Cloud that hovers over them, in the Pillar of Cloud that leads them by day and the Pillar of Fire at night. If you kill this entire people in one stroke, all the nations that have heard what has been going on will say, "Since GOD couldn't get these people into the land which he had promised to give them, he slaughtered them out in the wilderness.' "Now, please, let the power of the Master expand, enlarge itself greatly, along the lines you have laid out earlier when you said, GOD, slow to get angry and huge in loyal love, forgiving iniquity and rebellion and sin; Still, never just whitewashing sin. But extending the fallout of parents' sins to children into the third, even the fourth generation. "Please forgive the wrongdoing of this people out of the extravagance of your loyal love just as all along, from the time they left Egypt, you have been forgiving this people."

Got a special mission from Pastor Jim last night at the Core Leadership meeting last night. Since we started meeting several months ago, both Carrie and I have felt like we've just been spinning our wheels as a team, not really going anywhere. And it's difficult to lead the church in anything resembling a direction if you only meet for 90 minutes every month. Then, last night, PJ gave each couple a new mission. Go out and explore our church and the land God has promised us--the church's future. Find out if the future really is a land flowing with milk and honey or if giants walk the land. Recommend if we should go storming in and conquer the land or if we should remain here in the wilderness for a while more.

Essentially, we've finally been given the commision we were called to over a year ago to find the vision and direction for the church.

PJ gave us carte blanche to explore and discover the church as we've never done before. We have been given permission to turn over rocks and look at the worms underneath. We're encouraged to explore the failures and succeses of the past, and chart the course for the future. When we're done, we're to give our findings first to the CLT, then to the congregation as a whole.

If we are to complete this mission effectively, we have to realize that, to an extent, we have been wandering in the wilderness, just as Moses and the Israelites did, for some time. No direction, squabbling between the tribes (ministries), each man doing what is right in his own sight.

Maybe now, we can begin to unify the church the way it's supposed to be done. Maybe we can finally hear, as one body, where God is calling us next.

This is a big deal. There are a lot of things to consider, a lot of places to dig. This is going to requre our full attention for the next two months to chart the course for the next several years.


Tuesday, February 22, 2005


Okay, just had to add this to the most recent post:

I really enjoy seeing my little entries getting published, even if it's only for me to see and read. I probably enjoy it too much. I get a sick little thrill when the entry has been 'published,' And I invariably view the blog, just to see it again.

I love my writing style. I love reading my writing. I guess that means one of two things: either I'll never be a 'real' writer, because I'm entertained with my own ramblings, or I'm as talented as I think I am.

My guess is I'm just an ass.

Creative Avoidance

Just checked out the last "Bored" entry. Outside of the fact that I've already prepared for my bible lesson for this Friday, the that entry and this one could be pretty much interchangeable. Don't have anything to do at work. Don't feel like being productive. Don't want to tackle the backlog of bible reading/memorization that's piling up. Don't want to slog through creative stuff I could be doing on one of my other blogs.

I really suffer from inertia. When I don't have anything to do, I really have a hard time finding anything to do. Then, when I seem to have a full-plate, I tend to clean it up and tackle waxing the car afterwards, because I'm in the mood.

Today, I'm not in the mood.

Today, I'm poking around message boards and reading National Geographic.

Today, I'm being fat and lazy.

And bored.

Monday, February 21, 2005

Sunflower Farm: Your Reception Connection

Carrie had either an obscenely brilliant or obscenely foolhardy idea today while attending a historic barn conference:

Turn our property into a chapel/reception hall. Take out a huge loan (or get investors) to buy up the acreage behind our house and rennovate the barn, then rent the thing out for weddings/receptions. It would keep Carrie at home, tending to her flowers, which is what she always wanted, and would hopefully provide enough income for the two of us. We'd either hire on or partner up with our friends who have specialities in planning, photography, archetecture/design, and catering. It could either be massive, or explode in our faces. We've decided to pray about this for the rest of the year. That's how big this is. We won't be talking to anyone about this anytime soon, either. It's a secret, so don't say anything. Sshh.

Poker Night

Drew and I had a Poker night Saturday. Drew usually hosts it at his house, but since his wife is preggers, and not doing so well, I hosted it at our house.

Generally, the women evacuate the homestead, but Carrie made herself scarce by working in the library while the rest of us kibbutzed around the kitchen table.

I have to say, it was the most successful evening we've had so far. I think we had a total of eight guys there over the course of the evening, and we played from 6 until after midnight. Let's see, in addition to me and Drew, we had Dave O'Roark, Dave Wilson, Tod Heath, Keith Wong, and D'Amico.

I feel bad for O'Roark. He had to leave early for a late night date with his wife (and a couple of friends, so I sometimes get the feeling that when he does stuff like this with us, this is just his way of pressing the flesh, but that's another entry for another time), but he told us that Easter is definitely still on, even though nobody really wants it to be. He said he had a meeting with Augie and Randy where they decided on the Boot Camp style of production, where we learn the entire show on one weekend, drill it through that week, and produce it the following weekend. Then, on Sunday, he made a final plea to the church for volunteers.

Do I think it will work? Yes, unfortunately. Our church has a long history of stepping up when needed. In this particular case, I don't think anybody really wants them to step up, but I think they will. We have only 500 tickets sold for the event, spread over four performances. That's not good. Personally, I hope that Dave doesn't get the people he needs, so we can close the book on Easter once and for all.

Getting back to poker, even though we didn't play for money, Drew and I made out pretty well. We played two rounds--meaning that we started everyone with $5.00 in chips twice over the course of the night--and by the end of both of them, I had made at least a little profit. Of course, most of the folks we were playing with had to have a cheat sheet in front of them to figure out what they were doing, but it was still fun.

I think the next time we get together, assuming everyone can get there at the same time, we should play tounament style, with a prize at the end. Like, everyone ponies up $5.00 for the prize, and the winner at the end of the night gets a gift certificate for dinner somewhere. I don't know, I'll have to check with the other guys to see if that qualifies as gambling.

One last note: I thought it was ironic that of all the guys that were there, only Tod was from our couples' study. I figured that at least Brad would be there. I'll have to see if I can bring that up next time during our study.

Big Silver Truck

Carrie and I put a down payment on a big truck yesterday. It was Sunday, and I didn't want to leave the house for church, much less to go shopping for a big truck. Private seller, Ford F-150, automatic transmission, 2 wheel drive, extended cab (so we have back seats), 8-foot bed. It's a nice truck. But, like I said, it was Sunday, and I was sick. I really wasn't in the mood to go truck shopping. We ended up in a deep conversation late in the day.

We had gone to a dealership first, didn't find what we were looking for, and Carrie called the number for a small ad in the Dispatch she had found the day before. Carrie really led the entire project, from the very beginning when we were talking about getting a truck, through the shopping, figuring out what we needed, to finding truck availability and even driving the negotiations. She did the most of the talking. Then, as we were returning the truck to the owner, she asks me to close the deal. But when we get there, she jumps in to do the real closing. It bugged me a little bit, having her ask me to do it, and then not being patient enough to let me do what she asked me to do, but it didn't bother me enough to make a federal case out of it. Besides, I wasn't feeling well, and all I really wanted to do was go home and crawl into bed.

Then, late in the day, long after we had gotten home and I had taken a nice long nap, she asks me if she was wrong to jump in like she did, because she noticed that I was a little peeved at her at the time. I had to admit that I was bugged, but not terribly. Then she gets defensive and says that I was misleading the seller, and she felt the need to jump in to clarify, even though we had decided to buy the truck at the asking price. She and I had to clear the air about that, so that she understood that I do not process things the same way she does, and there was no real reason she had to step up. It simply takes me longer to get my motor started and get moving. Doesn't mean I'm any less in control, I just move more slowly.

I didn't really think about this until later, but she said that she gets really uncomfortable with awkward silences. She said that she had to "wait and wait" for me to say something, either to the salesperson or the truck owner. Now, on my side, maybe it was because I was a little fuzzy around the edges due to the cold medicine, but I felt perfectly capable of doing the negotiations. I wonder if she understands that those awkward silences are good. I saw no reason to say anything, so I didn't say anything. Let the seller fill the silence.

Oh, well. It wasn't that big of a deal, but it does point to the way she and I communicate, and the image we present to others of who is in charge, and who leads the relationship. I may have to share that with her tonight.

Thursday, February 17, 2005


Sometimes I have to wonder if the traffic guys for local radio stations do stuff like this on purpose, or if it's just the luck of the draw:

I was listening to a local radio station coming into work this morning, when I heard a commercial for a local tanning salon. The last line of of the ad was this sultry woman's voice saying, "Hottie Body Tan. We bring out your dark side."

The very next thing I hear is one of the local DJs saying, "Everybody loves a Honey-Baked Ham."

If I drank coffee, I would have spit it out.

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Mental Health Day

Stayed home from work today. I have to take days like this every once in a while, when I've been too busy at home. I enjoy vegetating when it's feasable. I play hooky, go to the movies, maybe browse the bookstores. Today I'm just staying home and reading and playing Prince of Persia.

Unfortunatly, Carrie almost never joins me on these days, because she's so loyal to the concept of doing her job. She'd feel too guilty.

I, however, have no such problem for days like this, and I'm enjoying myself.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Two Feet Left

You know, it's a good thing I'm working out twice a day now. When I got to the gym locker room last night, I saw a pair of shoes sitting on one of the benches and thought, Gee, those look a lot like my shoes. Then, when started rifling through my gym back, I realized they were my shoes.

That's the second time that's happened within a week. Friday night I left my John Deere hat there and had to ask for it back Saturday morning.

Monday, February 14, 2005


This is the definition of anal-retentive condescension:

One of my bosses brings a magazine and two post-it notes to my desk. She uses one of the post-its to mark an article inside the magazine, and puts the other on the cover. On the second one she writes, "Please copy the article on page 25 and return to me."

Keep in mind this is all happening at my desk.

Then, after she has marked the page and written the note that references the page number, shows me the magazine, opens it up to the page she wants copied, and asks if I can make a copy for her, referencing the page number again and the note on the cover.

All right! I get it! You don't think I'm smart, and you don't trust me to follow basic instructions without repetition. She must think I'm developmentally challenged.

... Or a fucking retard.


So, I'm working on getting in shape for the big triathlon in a couple of months. On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays I work on the treadmill and stationary bike, and on Thursdays and Fridays I work on the elliptical machines and rowers. And I've been following the instructions I've read in books to start slowly and increase your workout by 10% each week. Since it's currently too cold to run on a regular basis right now, I can't increase my mileage by 10%, I've been increasing my speed by 10% instead, until I get up to 10-minute miles. That's six miles per hour.

Today I got up to 4.8, and it nearly killed me. For the first time, I had to hold onto the guide bar just to keep moving.

I'm not going to lie. It wasn't fun, but I think I can keep it going for the rest of the week. Fortunately, I had already planned to plateau at 5mph next week, for a couple of weeks, and focus on building strength by increasing the elevation instead of the speed. Maybe that's what I should have been doing since the beginning, but what're you going to do?

And, of course, I did feel better afterwards, once I had gotten my breath back. But I continued to sweat for about an hour.

Once I can legitimately get myself to 6mph and an incline of 6.0, I will be very, very happy. But, I think I may be even happier once I can run on the road instead, and just concentrate on putting the miles behind me instead of focusing on a speed.


We got word that Carrie's other sister, Margaret, and her husband Mike, are having their second baby. It happened like this: We (Carrie, Stephanie, and I) went home to their parents to celebrate several birthdays. Because the family's rather large, and several family members have birthdays within a few weeks of each other, it's just easier to package them up and acknowledge them at the same time. It was a simple lunch and time of hanging out. No big thing, except that at the end of the meal, Claire, Carrie's four-year-old niece, announces "Can I have everybody's tenention? Daddy says I can tell everybody that I'm going to be a big sister."

Very cute, very nice.

Black Monday

Black Monday
A Poem
by Wesley Smith
(circa 1991)

Dear Saint Valentine:
I hate you.
I hate you.
I hate you.
Drop dead (Oh. You're already dead. Sorry)


Speaking of Valentine's Day and college, I thought I'd post this little ditty I composed about 13 years ago. It might actually be 14 at this point, because I think the original title was Black Monday. (I generally changed the day every year to express my feelings anew).

Yeah, I was a bitter SOB then, and I'm not much better now. But, you gotta admit, that there's funny!


So, Carrie and I celebrated Valentine's Day this past Saturday. We went to Mitchell's Steakhouse and went to see Hitch.

Mitchell's was an interesting experience. Mitchell's is one of the premier restaurants in Columbus, owned by one of the premier restauranteurs in Ohio. Even though they don't enforce a strict dress-code (I called, just to make sure), it's a little intimidating to walk in there. It's not necessarily ritzi or shi-shi (none of the Cameron's restaurants are), but it's reputation is huge around here. Tell anybody you're going to Mitchell's for dinner and you'll get raised eyebrows and an "Ooh. Mitchell's." Everybody knows it.

And the reputation is deserved. The dinner was absolutely delish. We got variations of steak and veggies, a couple of drinks and a thick, gooey desert. We paid with a couple of giftcards I got from the LCT cast last year ($75) and the job ($12, after another dinner we had at another, less expensive, restaurant last year). Final out-of-pocket cost: $40, plus tip.

It was the little things that really impressed me. They gave Carrie a black napkin because she was wearing a black dress, and they didn't want to get white fibers on it. When the waiter brough our check out, he addressed us as "Mr. & Mrs. Smith." Stuff like that. But still, $140 for dinner.

Was it worth it? Yeah, I'd say it was.


However, one thing I was not expecting, and should have kept my big mouth shut about, was other people I had gone there with before. See, even though I had never been to Mitchell's steakhouse, I had been in the building before, when it was owned by another restaurant. On a date.

Needless to say, Carrie took great delight in torturing me with "Oh, who else did you come here with?" She eventually asked me why I stopped seeing the woman I had brought there before. I told her "Because she lived too far out of town and she was too tied to her family." That seemed to shut her up on the subject.

Fellas, a word of advice. Never talk to your wife about old girlfriends on Valentine's day.


Okay, Hitch.

Since Carrie and I hadn't been to the movies in months, I was having difficulty finding a movie I thougth we'd both enjoy. I had originally wanted to see Hitch. It seemed like a funny, sweet movie, but the reviews I had read had given it an only mediocre score. And there were other films that I wanted to see just as much: In Good Company and Sideways. Eventually, it came down to which movie would be starting the soonest after we planned to be done with dinner.

While I would have to agree with the reviews that Hitch isn't Citizen Kane, it is a funny, entertaining movie, and it doesn't try to be anything but that. Maybe all the reviewers still recuperating from their Oscar-season hangovers, but I really appreciate it when a movie has no pretentions that it's anything more than a date movie. It didn't try to make a statement on modern society (although it did), but it just wanted to entertain. And in that, it succeeded quite well.


All in all, a very good evening. Especially since it got us out of the library.

Nobody Likes a Good Teacher.

A lot of stuff happened this weekend. Enough that I didn't have the opportunity to get it all down as it was happening. This is going to be the first of several posts, just playing catch up.


First things first: The study I led Friday night went well, even if it was a smaller group than usual. We just barely had a quorum, and we only had three women there (which is ironic--when we have a smaller than usual group, it's usually the men who are absent, at least in my experience), so we just ended the session after the lesson, instead of breaking into our different groups. We still didn't get home until after 11pm.

I don't know why it bugs me if there's a small turnout when I'm teaching, but it does. I am personally disappointed, because I work really hard on those lessons, especially this last one, and it's just a letdown when I only have 7-8 people with which to share what I've learned instead of the full 18. I know that it's not up to me to choose who to lead each session, but to lead those whom God has given me that week. But still, it seems to happen to me more often than the other guys, and the excuses are just lame: "We have to clean the house for a party tomorrow," "My parents are coming in and I have to entertain them tonight," "We're just not coming." Maybe this is petty of me, but don't those excuses sound awfully, I don't know, selfish? We had Carrie's sister that weekend, and we told her coming in that we had a prior engagement (a couple, actually), and that she would have to entertain herself.Carrie even told me that one couple in the group never even bothered to pick up the last study book we used. It just seems like they're calling themselves away from fellowship because they're afraid to be challenged. It's a problem that a lot of people in our church seem to have, but it seems especially hypocritical among our friends, that they pay an amount of lip-service to God, to the worship experience, but really don't want to be challenged on their beliefs. On the other hand, maybe I'm just being prideful by wanting other people to hear what I have to say. I don't know.

Am I wrong to be bothered by that?

Friday, February 11, 2005

Good News/Bad News

From the "Good News/Bad News" Department:

After waiting three months, I e-mailed Carolyn Grayson at the Grayson Agency in regards to the status of my submission Unlicensed Magic.

Good News: I received a response from her in under twelve hours.

Bad News: She said they've been short-staffed for the past several months, and hadn't gotten to my submission yet, but would get back to me in the next week.

Good News: They haven't rejected it yet.

Bad News: I have to wait another week, knowing that this is probably my last shot for now.

*sigh* No one said it would be easy.

Writer's... Phobia?

How weird is this?

I don't have writer's block right now, but I'm actually afraid to.

Over at, I'm in several role-playing games that I'm actually really into. They're fun, community-oriented, and provide instant audiences for my writing, even if it is one paragraph at a time. But, over the past several days, I haven't posted very much. And I find that I'm afraid to. Strangely, I'm fighting in most of them right now, and I still don't have a very good grasp on some of the more basic rules when it comes to fighting. I love the role-playing aspect of the games, coming up with new characters and all that. But I'm afriad I'll embarass myself in front of these men whom I will probably never meet face-to-face. I just don't want to seem like a schmuck in front of other professional nerds.

How whack is that?

And it's bleeding into other things. Obviously, my paranoia does coincide with me realizing I had access to Blogger via work. But, beyond that, I can type in this private journal about my personal crap much more easily than I can in my writing journals.

Strange, huh? Enough of this crap, I'm going over there and kick some fictional booty right now.

Right after I get a drink of water first.

Feelings on Non-Rejection

Seeing that you have e-mail waiting from you from a person who could either spell the beginning or the end of your writing career, but not being able to access that e-mail. This should be the definition of Hell.

When I got to to work this morning and I saw that e-mail from Carolyn Grayson sitting in my mailbox, but not able to access my yahoomail from work. That was emotional torture. And taking the walk out to my car, and then the drive to the library, practically chanting "It's probably nothing," to myself over and over and over again, very nearly killed me. My family has a history of heart problems. And, although I don't tell Carrie this, there have been times when my chest has felt the pressure, and I wonder Is this what a heart attack feels like? This morning was one of those times. It wasn't a real pain (although I've had those, too), but just a lot of adrenaline pumping through my muscles with nowhere to go.

At Least I Haven't Been Rejected:

From the "Good News/Bad News" Department:

After waiting three months, I e-mailed Carolyn Grayson at the Grayson Agency in regards to the status of my submission Unlicensed Magic.

Good News: I received a response from her in under twelve hours.

Bad News: She said they've been short-staffed for the past several months, and hadn't gotten to my submission yet, but would get back to me in the next week.

Good News: They haven't rejected it yet.

Bad News: I have to wait another week, knowing that this is probably my last shot for now.

*sigh* No one said it would be easy.

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Pirates & Werewolves

There are certain stock characters that everybody seems to love. The hooker with a heart of gold, the adventurer, the playboy,the gum-snapping secretary/waitress.

The same is true of fantasy novels. Two--I'll call them classes--classes that seem to have a huge fanbase regardless of the situation: vampires & ninjas.

Everybody loves vampire. I think it's the bad-boy nature of the characters. Natural seducers, singulary gorgeous, undead, damned for eternity. What's not to love? You put a vampire as the the protagonist of any novel and you have instant anti-hero. Someone who is either trying to deny his basic nature, or someone who willfully wallows in his own nature. People like Anne Rice and Laurel K. Hamilton have elevated--or lowered, depending on your point of view--the vampire from a tragic hero to a romance novel staple.

Now, ninjas are a little different to get a handle on. When I say 'ninja,' most folks aren't going to think of a typical story hero. Ninjas are usually the cannon fodder for who come swarming over the hill only to be swatted away from our hero. But here's the thing: the hero is generally a ninja, too. Not necessarily in the stricted sense of the word, but when you talk about any proud, loner-type of hero who survives on his intellect first and his incredible physical aptitude second, you're talking about a ninja.

Me, I don't personally like vampires or ninjas. Vampires, like I said, have evolved into romantic heros, when I've never personally found anything remotely romantic about them. Human monsters in every sense of the word, and over-used besides. Ninjas are just kind of... there.

You know what I like?

Werewolves and pirates.

Pirates, to me are the perfect anti-hero. They live totally for the moment. Pirates think with their swords more than their brains, but they're not trying to save the world, they don't have any noble goals except to find the treasure and bed as many damsels as they can. They drink until they puke and then they drink some more. They live totally for the moment. How can you not like that?

Werewolves are cool because they're just more human that vampires. Where vampires are seducers, werewolves are animals. Where vampires are manipulators, werewolves are trapped. They never wanted to be werewolves, they can't control themselves whene their under the full moon. They are as scared of themselves and what they can become as others are of them. Of course, you can morph a werewolf as much as a vampire, until they can change every night, or at will, for that matter. But it will never change the fact that werewolves will always be second to vampires. They are the Christina Aguilera of the monster world.

Nope, there aren't enough werewolf or pirate stories out there. But you know what's even better than werewolves or pirates?

Werewolf pirates.

Why not? It worked for Johnny Depp.

My Wife Is Cute When She Sleeps

When she's asleep, she whimpers like a puppy. It's the cutest thing!

... yeah, I know that it looks like I think she's nuts from a previous entry, but it's not really that bad. I don't think I'm overreacting, exactly, but just letting things go to my head. My wife is truely wonderful, and I wouldn't be nearly as successful as I am without her confidence and drive pushing me.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005


So, this very morning I'm in the gym locker room making my way to the shower. It's about 6:45 am. I've just finished a thirty-five minute workout on the treadmill. I'm sweaty, I'm exhausted, I still really haven't awakened completely from this morning. And, oh yeah, I'm completely butt-nekkid. As I'm walking down the hallway, this little Bilbo Baggins looking guy waves at me and says, "Hi, Wes."

Now, I don't know if I mentioned this, but I was butt-nekkid. I had a towel slung over my shoulder, but that was it. I don't like making conversation with strangers at the gym. I don't like making conversation with strangers when I'm naked. I certainly don't like making conversation with strangers when I'm naked at the gym.

Completely befuddled and more than a little annoyed, I give him a "Yeah, whatever" grunt, pass him in the hall and continue toward the showers. Sensing my confusion, he clears it up by saying, "Bill Williams, from Grace." And then I remember him:

This is the new Superintendent for the school system supported by our church.

And now he's seen me butt-nekkid naked.


Striving to stave off complete boredom in the workplace. That's why I have four different blogs here, plus visiting several different websites in any given day.

Truth is, what I'm really trying to do is avoid working on my Sermon on the Mount memorization. I slip further and further behind every day, and by the beginning of next week, I'll be working on memorizing vs 20-27 while not having finished vs 1-12.

And of course, after that, there's the Ephesians study I really should be preparing for Friday. I think I'll go work on those things before I log back on here. That should at least take an hour or so.

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Reading is Fun-duh-mental

I love books, but I don't enjoy reading. I love writing, but I don't enjoy reading.

Odd, huh?

I don't know what it is. I love everything about books. I love book shopping in musty old bookstores and the megastores. I love the illustrations on jackets and the pulpy hype on the back cover of a paperback. I love sitting in an overstuffed chair with a cup of cocoa or apple cider, thumbing through the pages and looking at the font used to print.

But I can't find anything to read.

Between my wife and I, we have, literally, thousands of books. We have so many that we're turning what was the master bedroom in our home into a library, complete with the overstuffed chairs and the fireplace.

The wife reads volumes every week. She reads at least one book a week for enjoyment. That's a slow week, and that's not including other books she weeds through simply for research.

But me? I love getting books, but when it comes to find something to read, I get stuck. Part of it is because I have so many books now that I can't decide what to read, and I hear of more new books almost every day. Part of it is due to the fact that, when I set a book down for the night, I like to have finished a chapter, so I tend to read books with short chapters, or I lose interest. And part of it is because I want to like genre novels--mysteries and fantasies mainly--but the hard fact is that most novels aren't good. The last good book I read was last year. Actually, it was about this time last year, now that I think about it.

I don't know. Maybe my attention span is just getting shorter. Well, I know it's getting shorter, but I'm not sure what can be done about it. When I have free time, I'd rather write than read. I'd rather post on message boards, or journal, or free-write, or study my bible (okay, maybe not that) or just about anything having to do with books than actually read one.

Testing for Pictures

Since I'm still new at this, I'm figuring out how to do certain things. Here's a picture. If it works, I want to talk about this picture:

EDIT: Well, that didn't work.

Monday, February 07, 2005

...But I'm Feeling Much Better Now!

Okay, sometimes we have to go through the crap to get to the good stuff. The wife and I were able to talk things through. She thinks that I just tend to obsess about letting her down, and I admit, that is a hang up of mine. I hate to think that she's disappointed in me about anything. Always have been. I am very blessed that tonight we had some tense moments talking things through, but didn't get into a yelling match. I am a little bugged that she tried to lay everything at my feet, but she at least admitted to doing some over-reacting herself this morning. So that's nice.

I love my wife very much. And when she smiles at me, when I know she means it, it's the most beautiful thing in the world.

She wants me to take more charge of things. I mentioned to her that I usually don't get a chance to assert myself because she's already taken the reins in most things. It's a kind of Catch-22: I feel like she tries to control and mother me, and she feels like I'm forcing the authority onto her when she would rather I be in charge.

We're working on it.

Periodontic Hell

Well, had to go to the periodontist this mornig, so the wife could validate what I told her on Friday. It can be fairly frustrating to deal with her uncontrollable need to know, to verify, to double-check everything I say, but at least it's taken care of.

And, of course, she's IMing me right now, asking if I'm mad at her, so I just re-typed what I said above. So now I have this to deal with.

  1. I'm having a throroughly shitty this morning. And I don't use that kind of language except for comedic effect, so that shows you just how lousy it's been:
  2. Woke up a half-hour late
  3. Forgot to pack my work shoes when I went to the gym
  4. Had my wife yell at me because I wasn't waiting for her where she thought I should be after I worked out
  5. Had to re-hash the entire procedure I had Friday and what would need to happen next because my wife wasn't clear on it.
  6. And the I had to re-hash the entire morning again with my wife on IM just now

And it's not even lunchtime yet.

Sunday, February 06, 2005

Superbowl XXXIX


That was underwhelming.

I've probably gotten more into pro football this year than I have since my family moved away from San Francisco at the end of the Montana era, so this was the first game in a long time where I was actually paying more attention to the players than I was to the commercials (not that the commercials really warranted any attention either.

But still, what happened to the Eagles in the final minutes of the game? I swear to you that McNabb was making plays that make me wonder if he was getting paid to throw the game. The pressure of being in his first Superbowl probably just got to him, but, geez, the number of interceptions during a Superbowl was simply unacceptable.

Yes, it was a close game, but not an especially exciting one. There were how many possessions in the first quarter, 10-12? I think there were a few where the offensive team had their three downs and punted with less than a minute of possession.

All together, I would call the game "Disappointing."